I can't believe I agreed to this. Three (no, four) entire weeks without my son, my two year old. The entire September. I try to be "strong" and I can't help but constantly wonder how other women do it? Send your baby away for the summer, or split custody in a long period ratio. When I'm saying this is hard for me, I'm not looking for applause or praise... I'm actually looking for help (LOL) coping methods and people who would like to interact with me to show me what its like to be KiD fReE. ahaha I know plenty of women who split "custody" with the other parent, but it's usually more like "Hey you get Dooney Tuesday and Wednesdays" or "You pick him up after school everyday and keep him for a couple hours"...hahaha I'm definitely the Mom giving you a few hours.
Lately, I've been asking Dash's Dad to move back to Indiana. He currently lives all the way in Alabama - the bottom of Alabama to be factual - a nine hour drive.
QUICK INTERRUPTION: Dash being gone has actually sparked me to blog again, a coping method. So hey, there is one positive.
His Father moved to Indiana for maybe six months before his own Father fell ill and he needed to return to Alabama. I'm a pretty understanding gal, and I actually didn't expect for him to stay that long, lol. I do wish he would return though. Not for the sake of just my sanity... cause every time Dash is away I realize how much I don't need a break. Thank you very much. Okay, maybe one day out the weekend or at least while Mommy works out... or just to have someone to depend on with help with picking and dropping him off from daycare/sports/activities.
I want Dash to have that constant interaction with his Father. Not that when it's good for me or him. Just constantly knowing that's my dad. And you know people want me to point the finger at him for not living in Indiana or closer to his son. But I honestly don't care. Kinda.
I feel like the decisions he make ABSOLUTELY effect Dash. Every single last one... from him choosing to eat expensively or buy himself something nice. (Not saying that's what he does, just examples.) But for me, at the end of the day, he has to ultimately deal with God. I always encourage women (and men) to not get frustrated or mad with your child's parent, no matter how dumb you think they maybe being or how non-understanding they are. Simply pray. Cause what can you honestly do? *Break the windows out his car* And I'm glad I've had that mindset from the beginning. I mean of course, sometimes I state my opinion but never in attempts to argue with his Father... but really you CAN NOT change anyone's mentality just hope for the best!
As you can see, this whole thing (it's officially week two) is hitting me hard. Watching videos of Dash at Chuck'E Cheese and the pool, Mama is getting sappy. I've actually cried on the phone with my dumpling the last two days because I miss him and I don't want him to be mad at me for my decisions. So as I'm writing this, I'm putting on my big mama undies and going to turn this trip into something more, some how. I have to get a little more out of this trip JUST BECAUSE I'm being away from my baby way too long.
Least it's for a good reason though.
Xox, Pia Ming
